‘I Am My Hair’ – by Amelia

Tags

baby, hair, motherhood

My Mummy recently took me to get my very first haircut. She had just come back from visiting Aunty Ciara and Uncle Ben and she had missed me very much. It was a lovely sunny Saturday; so she put me in the pram and we went up to see Paul at Color’s Hairdressing.

Paul is Mummy’s lovely hairdresser – Mummy said that if I called him ‘lovely’, she might get a free haircut!

I fell asleep on the way up there, but I woke up when we arrived and I was all ready to be pampered! Paul was very nice, he put me on Mummy’s knee in the big chair and explained to me that I was going to get my hair cut like a big grown up girl, and that Mummy would get to keep a lock of my hair. Then he began to snip at my little soft baby curls, but he was very gentle and careful and I got to eat my grapes while he worked.

Mummy looked a bit weepy as he cut my hair, like she was going to cry or something, but she managed to keep it together for the most part.

What a wuss.

I can’t wait to go back…maybe I will get a mohican next time…

Amelia

xx

12 reasons to be thankful…

Tags

new parents, weight loss journey

DISCLAIMER: Please note that any and/or all opinions and ideas conveyed in the following blog post will most likely be;

A) Incredibly cheesy and sentimental.

B) Effusive and adoring of my child.

And C) Incredibly boring to those readers who don’t have kids…and also probably those who do.

Since we celebrated Amelia’s first birthday this week, I’ve been thinking about how many things have made me happy this year, and thought I would like to recount the twelve reasons (one for each month – see what I did there?) why this last year has been a special year so far for me…the main reason of course being the birth of Amelia, but hey, you knew that. Also just noticing how many times I’ve said ‘reason’ so far. Apologies. I couldn’t be bothered looking up a thesaurus…

April: Well it is the most obvious one, of course – Amelia came along 2 days early (thank GOD she wasn’t born on Hitler’s birthday) and all of a sudden made me and the G Man into a pair of bewildered but excited new parents. She is, of course, the main reason why this year has been life changing, fun, scary, overwhelming, but unbelievably special.

May: I suppose in May I was getting well into the learning curve. I’d never changed a nappy before (seriously) but we were thrown in at the deep end, and we managed to get used to it, as I’m sure all parents do. I also began my weight loss journey at Weight Watchers, and made a decent start.

June: I learned a really important lesson last June. I finally learned how important it is to let friendships end when they have run their course. Sometimes it isn’t worth the headache or heartache. Having Amelia taught me not to chase the arguments and petty stuff, and to just walk away.

July: Was the month I began writing this blog. A pal of mine suggested it and he was definitely right – it was my thing and I absolutely love it. It allows me to be creative in so many ways, and to connect, share and laugh with so many existing (and new) friends in the land of t’internet!

August: Saw two celebrations. My first birthday as a Mum and Amelia’s christening. We had a wonderful weekend and it made me realise what amazingly generous, kind, decent and true family and friends we have. We got to see Amelia’s Godparents, Aunty C and Uncle B come to her christening and stand for her. *proud tear

September: It dawned on me this month when the new school term had started, that I didn’t have to go back to work just yet. It made me realise what precious time I had left of my maternity leave, and I started appreciating it more; going out for big walks with the pram, into town, generally chilling out and spending time with the baby.

October: Led us to our holiday in Bristol and Devon, where we spent Amelia’s first Halloween with Aunty C and Uncle B. Good times.

November: Saw me getting to 6 months at weight watchers and realising my first weight loss goal. I realised very clearly then that I was going to achieve my target weight, and I’m not far off it now – watch this space!

December: Was of course baby’s first Christmas. Very exciting! Also I got a weekend job playing Mrs Claus (yes I know, I will be too skinny next year!) and reading stories to the children in line to see Santa. Great fun!

January: I did it. I faced it – I started back to work. I thought I was going to hate it. Thought I would be upset and find the workload strange or the pupils too challenging after such a long break. But weirdly, I didn’t. I realised how much I love my job and how much I missed it. (Realising this is probably the cheesiest part of this whole post but, ‘feck it, I’ve gone too far now to stop!)

February: The G Man and I had our first night away without Amelia and we just felt so secure in knowing that our family was looking after her and how much they love her. I don’t think I will ever take family for granted.

March: After a year of not being involved with our Muscial Society, me and the G Man were once again in the saddle working backstage at their annual production. It was so great to see everyone together, enjoy the banter and fun and generally catch up. Aftershow parties rock, also.

What a difference a year makes.

Show me the money…

Tags

baby, budget, finances, loan, motherhood, parenting

I’m sitting on a soft, sandy beach, while the Caribbean laps at my feet. My perfectly tanned legs are stretched out before me, and I recline on the sun lounger with a cool, refreshing drink beside me, and I think about perhaps having a back massage or a facial later on in the spa of the 5 star hotel I’m staying in. Of course, I’m in the penthouse suite; with butler service, an enormous bed, separate living room and study; and I have gourmet meals in the private dining room every night, while being serenaded by Michael Buble. The actual Michael Buble. In person…

Sorry, what’s that you say? I was dreaming? Was I? I don’t have gourmet meals? I haven’t got a suite in a 5 star hotel? Michael Buble would rather dip his head in tar than sing to me because I can’t afford him?

Sigh.

Well, okay it was a bit of an extreme ideal, but I am trying to make a point.

That luxurious life is currently well out of my reach, and probably always will be, but I was thinking recently about the struggles that so many of us have nowadays just to pay for the normal, everyday things in life, let alone holidays or meals out.

Babies cost money.

I read online recently that the latest estimate of the total cost of raising a child in the UK today is around £218,000.

I will wait a second while you mop up the tea you just spat out all over yourself…

Yep, you heard me right, £218,000. And that’s just one.

The hubby and I recently went away overnight for a Valentine’s break to a local hotel that was offering a special discounted deal. This was our first night away from the baby since she was born, but that wasn’t the big issue. It was the agonising decision over whether to spend the money on the hotel break or not. It’s hard, you can’t but help weigh up how much you are spending against the equivalent of what you could get for the baby with the same money – the cost of a coat for example, being the same as a few days of childcare. Almost every spending decision is taken with so much more care and worry than before the baby came along, and the idea of saving money becomes so much more important too – because you never know when you might need it in the future.

I think it’s very hard to be able to juggle your finances even before you have a baby, and when a family does come along, it is doubly hard to make the same amount of money go further, as well as paying for childcare. It also doesn’t help that maternity pay (the sort I received, anyway) really doesn’t remotely stretch far enough to replace the usual income you receive when you are in full time work. For me, it made maternity leave much more stressful than it should have been. Thankfully, I had a helpful family, and understanding creditors who I made arrangements with, and happily, I’m back on track. There are other options like getting a loan, or using savings to keep you on track, and depending on your personal situation, either would work. I’ve tried hard, too, to avoid buying anything frivolous, and to just budget for the basics that we need – as even those things are expensive nowadays. I never thought I would be so boring as to exclaim to the G Man in the supermarket; “Christ, have you seen the price of those eggs?” but that is what the current economical climate has reduced us all to. There is one thing though; that I still save a little money aside for, and that’s a lottery ticket.

I can dream, can’t I?

Valentine’s Break…?

You long for it, yet dread it at the same time. You think of how relaxing it will be, but also how scary. No, I’m not talking about Valentine’s Day (although those descriptions still sort of apply), but I’m talking about having your first full day and night away from your baby.

Eek.

Of course, we’re not hermits, and we know the importance of staying in touch with friends, having the occasional night out or meal together. And when the budget allows, we do that every so often, even if it is just to the cinema. (Devastated I didn’t get to see “The Hobbit”, though.)

However, we recently decided to test our mettle and go away for one night to a hotel for a Valentine’s Day break (cheesy, or what, but the ‘discount dealie’ was the only way we could afford it!) and we left Nana in charge of Amelia.

How did it go, I hear you ask?

Well, here is my 12 point plan of how (not) to manage your first night away;

1. Arrive at hotel.

2. Text Mum to check all okay with Amelia.

3. Go to hotel pool and have soothing jacuzzi and spend the whole time talking about Amelia.

4. Go back to the room to read (or in the G man’s case, play his PS Vita).

5. Crack after 20 minutes of reading and call Mum to check Amelia is okay, only to be informed sarcastically; ‘No, Emma, the fairies kidnapped her…’

6. Go out for meal in the hotel.

7. Spend the meal planning Amelia’s birthday celebrations.

8. Have one too many glasses of wine (or pints of Guinness, in the G man’s case) and stumble back to the room at nine thirty, yes NINE THIRTY, to watch ‘Sleepy Hollow’ and fall asleep even before it is over.

9. Wake up repeatedly at 2 hour intervals throughout the night thinking you have to check the cot/baby and realising you don’t have to.

10. Get up for lovely cooked breakfast and call Nana to check on Amelia. Again.

11. Go for facial and back massage in hotel spa and fall asleep and snore loudly because of broken sleep the night before.

12. Pack. Race home. Hug baby.

And that my friends, is how to have your first night away. I think we managed it with a drop of doubt, a smidgen of worry, and a just a little bit of mania thrown in for good measure.

Just how it should be.

Me and My Girl…

Me and My Girl.

This has a double meaning for me this year – it’s the name of a musical, but also it makes me think of my brand new girl; who, this time last year, was well on her way to arriving.

This time last year. Lordy.

This time last year seems literally, and I mean literally like yesterday. I’m sure most new parents feel like the first year of their baby’s life goes in so quickly, and it really does seem to have flown in for us. Of course, she’s not a year old just yet, but the final weeks before her birth are as strong in my memory as the birth itself, and I’m remembering them so clearly at the moment because an annual event is taking place for me and some of my friends.

Those reading this blog who know me personally, know of my passion and love for musical theatre, and I’ve been lucky enough to be a member of a local musical society called Fortwilliam Musical Society for the past 13 years, being involved onstage, playing roles in various productions as well as getting to try my hand at directing and producing our Youth productions in more recent years. Yes, that’s me in the middle a million years ago, playing Minnie Faye in ‘Hello, Dolly’ – credit to Niall Laverty for the pic!

Of course, when Miss Amelia came along, my usual commitment of 3 evenings a week and Sunday afternoons spent at rehearsals, committee meetings and so forth went totally out the window – understandably so. But I remember my doctor telling me that it is important to try and keep up some hobbies after you’ve had a baby, and while it wouldn’t be realistic to be as heavily involved as I once was, I knew I still wanted to be a part of things this year, which is why I was so excited to attend a rehearsal of their upcoming production ‘Me and My Girl’, yesterday, in advance of it opening next week. It was so nice to bring Amelia with me to rehearsal, where she was so welcome – there is such a sense of family about our musical society, a sense of fun and a sense of belonging, a rare thing to find these days.

This time last year I was sitting backstage on a stool during our production of “Oliver!”, massive bump out front, swollen feet and constant heartburn, swigging Gaviscon, rubbing my tired eyes and aching muscles, while applying a prosthetic nose to Fagin and generally overseeing the makeup. Amelia’s Nana and the G Man kept reminding me to take it easy, and to be fair I barely moved from the stool, but I had to go, had to be there, because I knew it would be the last show in which I would be fully involved for quite some time to come. I knew the baby would take priority once it was born, and I felt I wanted to eke every last bit of fun out of my ‘last’ show with our company.

It’s going to be such a great show this year, and me and the G Man are looking forward to helping out backstage which will be nice, because it means we get to stay involved with the production, see our friends and enjoy the experience – I think I would actually, literally, cry into my pillow if I couldn’t be involved – so we have Nana to thank for babysitting, she’s a legend.

So, a massive ‘break a leg’ to all my FMS pals, I will be cheering you on from the wings and wishing I was on stage with you…but I’ll settle for a glass of wine on closing night

More than words.

Tags

baby development, books, motherhood, speech, words

Language. We take it for granted, in my opinion.

As an English teacher and general lover of literature, communication and language, I’ve always had an interest in how people use language to interact with each other, so I have found it absolutely fascinating to observe how Amelia’s language is developing.

Obviously, as her Mum, I’m keen to see and hear her start to babble and talk, but on a totally separate level, I just find the idea of a child soaking up the linguistic world around them, word by word, sound by sound, and eventually gaining ownership of it so that they can talk, express themselves and learn even more; so SO interesting.

With that thought, I have to share that there was that momentous occasion in our house a few weeks ago, oh yes….the first word.

How do we know it was an actual word, and not just babble?

Well, it was specific, it was unprompted, and it was repeated on 3 separate occasions within a half hour.

“Dada.”

Yes, you heard it. The first word Amelia spoke, and also you might have heard the sound of my heart breaking in two.

Devastating and wonderful all at once. WHY did it have to be “Dada”? Of course, I have conducted extensive research, (ahem), and I have learned that ‘Dada’ is the easiest sound for babies to say; but that doesn’t stop me wishing for a “Mama” and it doesn’t stop the G-Man from being extremely smug.

Smug bugger that he is.

Humph.

Either way, we are bursting with pride, as all new parents are when the first word is conquered and spoken, and there have since been rumblings of ‘Mama’, ‘Nana’, and ‘book’, so watch this space!!

Show me your teeth…

Tags

baby, motherhood, parenting, teething

“Emma. Now that your baby is 10 months old, let’s see how you’ve been coping when the baby is…”

…hungry?”

“Check!” I say, happily.

“…tired?”

“Check!” I say, cheerfully.

“… has a dirty nappy?”

“Check!” I smile, proudly.

“…is sick?”

“Check!” I beam, serenely.

“…is teething…..?”

…………………..*tumbleweed*………………

Yes. Teething. The monstrous, horrific, all consuming terror, worry, anxiety and lack of sleep that comes for the whole family unit, when a little baby is cutting its first teeth.

Why is it so bad? Because there is so little you can really do about it.

Amelia now has 6 teeth ‘through’ the gum. Two bottom front teeth are totally up (and looking very cute) and the two top front teeth are properly poking through, although not completely down yet, and the next two top teeth are ‘just’ through the gum. It’s taken copious amounts of tears, rocking, teething gels and powders, baby medicine, lullabies, cuddles, teething toys and we have, at several points, even resorted to prayer; I kid you not. (We aren’t the most Holy-of-Rollers, so I’m not sure God was going to be moving quickly on that one, what with all the war, famine and poverty in the world, but it was worth a try.)

I feel so sorry for her when her teeth are giving her hassle. I know its natural and normal, but it does make me wonder about how horrible nature can be, letting a little baby go through such discomfort and pain in order to grow their teeth, just to have them fall out a few years later, and then the whole process begins again. But at least by then they understand what is happening to them.

One good thing about the new teeth appearing is teaching her to brush them. It’s quite a novelty for her, and she claps her hands with excitement when she sees the toothbrush coming towards her – she loves the taste of it, so we have no worries on that score.

So we only have 6 down and 14 more to go…

Anyone got a time machine?

Food for Thought…

Tags

baby, boiled egg, butternut squash risotto, food, motherhood, parenting, weaning

Other new Mums out there might just be getting to grips with all sorts of new foods to give their baby, as am I. You do worry sometimes that you’re not giving them enough variation, or that you aren’t getting enough water into them and so forth. I’m starting to really enjoy the weaning process, and Amelia is making it very easy, she loves her grub I must say. (I wonder where she gets that from!)

Now that she is 9 months, we are giving her lots more new foods and she is beginning to learn how to feed herself. That’s a whole separate blog post about how to get Weetabix and banana out of your hair/clothes/the carpet when she has been experimenting with using a spoon – oh the joys!

I’ve always been a bit OCD and Mrs Super-Organised (I say this without shame, there are dozens of us) and I enjoy making Amelia’s meals in advance, once a month, and freezing them. I do this for several reasons: 1. I know exactly what is going into her food; 2. It is cheaper than buying ready made baby jars, and 3. It tastes nicer.

I’m not remotely judging anyone who buys the baby food ready made, everyone is different and their lives place different demands on them and so forth, and I’ve happily used them when I’ve run out of my own, but this is the way I prefer to do it. Plus it means that I only sacrifice one day of cooking which means that for the next 29 or so days, all I have to do is lift a meal out of the freezer.

Since her meals are always on my mind (what an exciting person I am), I thought I would put down in a blog post what sort of food I’ve been trying out with her, in the hopes that some other bloggers/Mums might find it helpful or maybe share some of their own ideas. I’ve broken it down into top 5 categories of what she really enjoys, although we’ve tried many others with her. These are her favourites – here goes;

Top 5 Main Meals:    

1. Butternut Squash Risotto

2. Spaghetti Bolognese (with small baby pasta)

3. Boiled Egg mashed up with soft bread and butter

4. Cod and sweet potato

5. Beef, leek and mushroom casserole

Top 5 Desserts: (all stones/pips removed where needed)

1. Mango with natural yogurt

2. Mashed banana and avocado

3. Blackberries and Apples stewed with brown sugar and natural yoghurt

4. Nectarines with natural yoghurt

5. Sweet Orange with natural yogurt

(Can you tell I like giving her natural yoghurt?)

Top 5 Snacks (Finger Foods):

1. Bread with hummus

2. Small cubes of cheese

3. Cheerios (softened in milk)

4. Green beans (cooked until fairly soft)

5. Carrot sticks (cooked until fairly soft)

The only thing she really doesn’t seem to like so far is broccoli – mashed, blended, whole – she just hates it and gives us a look as if to say; ‘Are you kidding? You’ve tried this before and I’m not buying it, give it up, Mum’ I can’t say I blame her to be honest and she doesn’t turn her nose up at anything else, so I won’t force her to eat it.

One thing I have noticed, though, is that she is even more aware of things that we eat when we are with her, and she wants us to share it with her. That will definitely help my diet regime as I just can’t sit in front of her and eat chocolate or crisps…the guilt is immense!

At this rate I will be a size eight by Easter…

(Mmmmm Easter Eggs…maybe not)

What’s in a name…?

Tags

baby name, motherhood, od, parenting

“What’s in a name? That which we call a rose by any other name would smell as sweet.”

Awww. Yes I’m a geeky English teacher, so I had to throw in a Shakespeare reference somewhere…a prize to the person who can name the play WITHOUT using Google…!!

When I was little, and imagining being a ‘growed-up’ with my friends, we would talk about what we would name our children. If you had a daughter, what would you name her? If you had a son, what name jumped out? We would share these dreams and imaginings with each other and play that game where you hold a pendant over your hand and see if it went in a circle or a line. God, we really had no toys back then. My parents could have at least got me a pack of cards or some bubbles…

But what eventually happens is, you have a daughter (or a son) and you have to name them. This is of course, quite important. This name has to follow them through life, it has to be a pleasant name, it has to sound good with the surname, but it also can’t be silly or frivolous; (‘Annette Curtain’ springs to mind, can you imagine?), as the bullies in the playground will take any excuse. I remember friends of mine who had thier third child last year, a little boy; and they were telling me how they came up with the name – the Mum would shout out a random name and the Dad would do his best to see how he could corrupt it, mock it, or generally turn it into a joke. The first name they came to that he couldn’t manage to subvert would be the name they picked. It may sound silly, but I thought it made a lot of sense. I myself would hate to think my child would be bullied or made fun of because of the name I gave her. I was lucky enough to have a decent first name and an unusual and pretty kick-ass surname, so I never had this worry.

I remember the moment in the delivery room when Amelia was born…I heard myself announce with flamboyance through the misty twilight of the anasthetic and general confusion; “Everyone meet Amelia Catherine…” (yes, I have a flair for the dramatic, even when I’m drugged up to the eyeballs, actually maybe especially then…) We had discussed the name Amelia of course, I didn’t just pull a fast one on the G Man, and it was one of the few girls names we agreed on, but I had been so convinced that she was going to be a boy that I hadn’t given it too much thought. The moment she was born I just knew what we should call her.

This last week or so, the Top 100 baby names for 2012 were published, with Amelia being in the top 5 and in some cases, the number 1 most popular baby name for a girl in the UK last year. I am raging about this. (For those who don’t personally know me, I am of a generally huffy disposition.) I had NO idea. I thought I was being original and kind of geeky (we are massive Dr Who fans), and I am as FAR from an X-Factor fan as you get so I didn’t even think about Amelia-Lily. *sigh*

The meaning of the name Amelia is defined as ‘industrious’ and ‘striving’. So, to be fair, I don’t think the ‘X-Factor-yuckiness’ would have stopped me giving her that name; as since we’ve come to know her, and as her personality develops into such a sunny, happy and strong little person, it becomes clearer all the time, she quite simply could never have been called anything else.

Working 9 to 5…

Tags

baby, maternity leave, motherhood

Maternity leave.

Those magic words.

All those amazing and comprehensive plans you make for what you will accomplish on maternity leave (aside from actually having the baby, that is)

Here were my plans that I intended to complete during naptimes…

1. Do some reading.
2. Catch up on box set DVDs
3. Have lovely lunches and catch-ups with friends
4. Decorate my bedroom.
5. Crochet, crochet, crochet
6. Lose weight.

The only one of those I accomplished was number 6, which to be fair, was by far the most important one. I had this notion that aside from looking after the baby I would have all this time left over to DO things.

*snort*

Sorry, just laughing at my own naive stupidity there. Join me, please.

Of course you get ‘time’, and that time is either spent feeding, changing, playing with baby, dressing, bathing, walking/pushing, driving, shopping or, mercifully after all that, sleeping. I don’t remotely resent it, however, and I really loved just being with Amelia all day, because I knew that time was ticking away, counting down to the day I had to go back to work.

That day was two weeks before Christmas.

Gulp.

But…

I’m still alive. It was actually okay. I’m lucky enough to work in a place with easy going, welcoming and helpful colleagues, who are allowing me to ease back in gently. It feels like I’ve never been away, and Amelia is so happy with the baby minder that I have no worries on that score.

So far, so good.

But you might be wondering what the best thing is about going back to work after maternity leave?

No. More. Maternity pay.

Thank GOD!